Don’t Look Down
Dating (My Ex-Husband) After Divorce
Post-divorce life is turning out to be very interesting
To Avoid a Broken Heart, Do Not Love
My Last Days as Someone’s Wife
On Taking the Easy Way Out
When Your Soon-to-Be Ex Is Your Soul Mate
Scorched Earth
First Rule of a Positive Divorce
5 Things That Changed My Divorce
If You Love Someone, Set Them Free. And Other Lies
The Last Divorce Writer Rides Again
May Divorce Be With You
Next Time You See Me, I’ll Be Laughing at Divorce
Even Though We're Divorcing, I Want You to Be Happy (And Other B.S. Tales)

Me, Roy, and Mark arrive to venue 1. We walk to the back where live music plays. Rich has already engaged a target and is talking with her, sitting down. I get the hint that he wants to be alone, but for whatever reason, Mark lingers. Roy just has no fucking clue — his first instinct is to drink. I decide not to babysit him, and I get to the task of opening sets. First set, on my way back to the main room. 3 girls, hipster 6.5 and two 7′s —- I actually like the 6.5 better because of her style (nah just kidding, I saw her first).

I give them the drug dealer opener — I’m sort of pleased with my delivery. So now, they do the same thing all of them do, apprehensively turn a bit to consider. Almost no enthusiasm. In the middle of their explanations, I transition to hairdresser bit. Still tepid — she’s like ‘no.’ And I mean, she’s like ‘-NO-’ I continue moving forward, trying to engage the group.

“Now that i have you all here, what about a green mowhawk….?” Blah blah blah she’s hot, blah blah blah I want to trust her. The 6.5 sort of cuts me off, fairly quickly ‘yeah no, don’t get the mohawk. I like how you have it now.’ But it’s flatly delivered. By this point I practically feel blown out, but fuck it — you know?

I launch into another little routine

“You’re the bad ones, and she’s the good one. I know she’s wearing the leather jacket, but she’s the good one.”

There’s laughter here, but it’s kind of nervous. I fucked up somewhere along the way — OR they’re just not digging me. I can’t think of anything else to say in the face of such a neutral, bordering on several IOD’s, set. So…I remember what Mark said “Listen, if you have to leave…don’t say something stupid like ‘nice meeting you,’ because that’s an admission of defeat. Just say like…’cheers, the night is young.’ Never communicate defeat.” So, I do just that ‘cheers the night is young,’ and I eject. I realize that A2 is probably going to be a significant challenge — shit, the Hook point is probably still a challenge, despite whatever luck I had.

I walk into the bar, make a quiet — SLOW — circuit. I try to look around, distracted as I move. I notice this set of filipino/asian girls. Why the shit not? Logistically, it’s the only set that makes sense. None of them are above a 5.5, so who gives a shit.

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